Sex and Tears

I met a guy! That sentence alone sounds very weird coming from me but anyway, I met a guy in what I think is a very unorthodox way. The conversation was good and I was able to be myself. He said all the right things, laughed at my jokes and viewed life very similar to how I do. We enjoyed some of the same hobbies but more importantly, he wasn't looking to play games and really wanted something with substance.  He agreed that the key to anything lasting is to be open and honest and nothing was off limits as far as discussion. Everything seemed great but there was just one problem and in my eyes a HUGE problem.  Although he professed to be saved, he was not practicing celibacy.  Well because I am and will continue until marriage, I felt this was something that could lead to disaster if clear boundaries weren't set.  After sharing our "issues" with another, it became obvious to me that his need or desire to be physical with a woman to show his love for her was just the symptom of a seed of distorted love that was planted early on in his life. God revealed some things about his past that I shared with him and he was very receiving. He was very aware of his issues and admitted to being a man that was broken. He admitted that exercising celibacy would be a hard struggle for him but because I was clearly special and invaluable, he was willing to refrain. Sounds good right? I thought so too until later conversations.
Galatians 5:17 states "For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do"  The later conversations re-affirmed the reality of this scripture because when talking to him more and more, I discerned that he knew practicing celibacy was best for his Spirit but he felt having sex was better for his flesh but before I could attach myself to this I needed to know which one ruled him?  We discussed 1 Cor 6:12-20, 1 Cor 9:25-27, 2 Cor 5:17-18 and Hebrews 12 so that he would understand that celibacy is not something we just decide to do but something we are required to do once we profess Jesus Christ as our savior.  He shared that he has talked to many women "in the church" who said they were celibate but at the first encounter, their clothes were off faster than his (this is another topic I will have to address in another blog) and that he could tell I was very serious about God and the last thing he wanted to be is someone that would put me in an uncomfortable position. I respected him for that.
Well the respect was lost yesterday. He sent me a very sexual text about how he felt at the very moment. I became immediately disrespected. I understood that it was going to be a struggle for him to be celibate BUT even if this is a feeling that your flesh was going through at the time, you should have never thought it was ok to send a message to a Woman of God like that when you clearly know I am different. This is when I made the decision to cut ties.  At this point, it became obvious that his flesh is ruling over his Spirit and I will not compromise my relationship with God for that of man.
I have a heart for people. I always feel the need to help people but sometimes it really gets in the way.  My co-worker says that I have a "let me fix you Spirit" Call it what you want but I never want to turn my back on anyone because they aren't delivered in a certain area of their lives but I have learned that I am not the One who does the changing. I have deposited seeds that I hope take root and bring forth a harvest of self control but self-control is a fruit of the Spirit and only God can change his heart. However, I must admit it was hard to let go because I really enjoyed him (and he was nice on the eyes lol)  I caught myself feeling emotional (see picture above) feeling like because of my determination to please God with my obedience to His Word I wouldn't attract anyone my age because so many people my age are still in the world but I had to get OUT my feelings and IN to what I know:

Psalm 84:11 "For the Lord God is a sun and shield; the Lord bestows favor and honor. NO good thing does he withhold from those who walk uprightly"
Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope"
Romans 8:8 "Those who are in the flesh cannot please God"
2 Timothy 2:22 "So flee youthful passions and purse righteousness, faith, love, and peace along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. Have nothing to do with foolish, ignorant controversies; you know that they breed quarrels. And the Lord's servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, after being captured by him to do his will.

Here are my takeaways:
You should never compromise your beliefs to please man and not just man in gender but man as far as the species.
Although we live in a sex-crazed society, we are still called to live a life of abstinence or celibacy in our seasons of singleness and monogamous faithfulness in marriage.
Wait for the Lord; be strong and let your heart take courage; wait for the Lord Psalm 27:14

Allow me to pray for you:
Almighty God, in the name of Jesus I thank you for this learning experience and for the many people who will read about it and be encouraged. I ask that you strengthen the hearts of all reading this blog and that something in it will take root and blossom into an abundant life of obedience. Father, I pray for those who are waiting for you to send their spouse, that they will be encouraged to keep waiting in good courage. I pray we become engulfed in Your love and understand how valuable we are to You. I pray that you will fill the longing in our hearts for companionship so that we will make better decisions. I pray that you help us not to settle for anything less than what you have for us. I pray that we will be obedient to your Word so that we may be found blameless and able to receive all the many blessings you have for us. Baptize us with your Spirit so that we may have the fruit of your Spirit. I love you Lord and You are indeed my everything. If there is someone who cannot testify to the same thing, I pray that you draw them nearer.  Lastly Father, I pray for those who are engaging in sexual relations. I pray that you bring about a Spirit of conviction and repentance so that they may be cleansed from all impurities in Jesus name.  God, you are indeed a keeper and I thank you for keeping me.  In Jesus name I pray. Amen  

Be blessed everyone and thanks for reading!